Tag Archives: New Beginnings

A Thousand Pains (Rough Draft of new Poem)

I could describe for you in a thousand ways, a thousand pains

But what a waste of such a day

To spend it sharing sorrow and pain

And trying to find some flowery way to say, from my eyes

A bitter rain

Oh fucking pain, leave me!

To happiness, once more, let me be again

I’m tired of missing her

Who deserves nothing of kindness or such compliments as this

If there be such a hell, it is nothing compared

To the abysmal fire of the lonely one’s personal pit

Always smoldering, rising high a damning smoke

To an always eternal black sky

 

I sit upon a throne of broken memories

And set sail my ship upon a sea built of tears

I am my own worst enemy

To feel such bitter pain so open and honest time and time and time again

This is the sound of sorrow come to steal from one who might be happy

All chance of rising higher

Let me loose you fucking nightmare!

Let me be once again, with someone worthy, a happy pair

Curse you memory for all the smiles you bring forward to my mind

All the road trips and laughter and in both symbol and literal the travelled miles

Curse you

 

Tired of sitting here, being here, pacing here

Tired so damned tired of perpetually feeling such a feeling as this

Is there no such thing as happiness for one such as I, who though she deserve it not, damn it if I don’t miss

Looking, hoping, searching for that one new smile

To turn it all back around, and give me something, some higher promised beautiful ground

To go and look upon the world new, and feel that feeling of love once again whole and true

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